Beyond Survival: Reclaiming My Life After I Survived Rape
About The Book
The night I was raped, my soul was murdered, and I received a lifelong membership to a club I had not sought to join. I tell you my story with raw and vulnerable honesty to help those who are also “club members.”
Eight minutes of one dark night in a college campus parking garage changed Amanda’s life. After the rape, she spiraled down, battling shame, denial, and the agonizing pain of not being believed. Those eight minutes started a lifelong journey that eventually included forgiveness and walking in freedom and liberty through her faith in Christ.
Amanda Collins Johnson courageously shares her testimony of going from merely existing to being able to help those who have survived sexual assault know that living an abundant life in Christ is possible. Insightful tools for understanding the survivor’s heart will assist those who love the victims of assault as well as those who advocate for them and minister to them.
About The Author
Amanda Collins Johnson
Amanda Collins Johnson has a bachelor’s degree in education and English and considers her greatest accomplishments as being her husband Nate’s wife and a homeschooling momma to three daughters. Featured on several podcasts, in publications, and on Fox and Friends and The Glenn Beck Show, she has shared her story on college campuses, at women’s conferences, and at law enforcement conferences. She enjoys time with her family, mentoring young women, leading Bible studies, and running.
Quotes from... Beyond Survival: Reclaiming My Life After I Survived Rape
Reality was crashing into my desire for denial, and the collision was going to create so much more collateral damage than I could have ever foreseen. You see, rape is not an event that happens and ends and is now over. It influences every aspect of life—faith, daily emotions, self-image, relationships, and sexuality. The issues remain real and current long after the rape “ends.”
Rape is the greatest undetected weapon the Enemy has used against women throughout all time because rape brings mountains of displaced shame. Shame is the main reason women do not report rape, along with a legitimate fear of not being believed.
The scars from my wounds are still there, and I often feel a deep pain. However, I now have access to the balm that soothes those wounds. The process has been messy and exhausting and has required a tremendous community of people around me, but it has been completely worth every stride.
With denial still strongly lingering, I planned not to tell a single soul. Ever. No one was ever going to know about the rape. At this point—two weeks later—I would look like a crazy person desperately seeking attention.
Honestly, I don’t want to wrestle with You, Lord. But where else can I go? I know somehow I will praise You with all of who I am again, I just don’t see how.
Forgiveness allows me to experience the smallest fraction of what held Jesus on the cross for my benefit and gain an understanding of what the Savior endured on my behalf.
My identity is no longer the untouchable rape victim or the woman who is merely surviving. My identity is not found in what onlookers say about me, encouraging or otherwise. Jesus looks at me and says, “Amanda, your faith has saved you. Go in peace.”
Because of my journey, I have gained enormous amounts of compassion for others, I am more approachable, and I’m slower now to pass judgment. Most profoundly, I have gained a fractional understanding of the evil Jesus encountered the night He was betrayed, captured, wrongly convicted, stripped naked, and beaten beyond recognition. I have a greater appreciation for what